Frozen Nowhere

I left my husband almost 10 months ago… in that time my children and I have been crammed into a small house with my parents. I left because I didn’t feel I could be true to myself as long as I stayed with him. It sounds so small and pitiful a reason to quit a marriage… but there was WAY more to it than just being tired of marriage, and being tired of being with him. I won’t go into it here, because that is the past and this blog is about creating a future. Let’s just say that we had been living in limbo, and since he was unwilling to give up HIS house I had to leave. And since I had no where else to go, and an income too low to afford full time daycare AND rent, utilities and groceries on my own. So I moved in with my parents, as a temporary measure.

And I left 90% of the marital property behind in our marital home, with the idea that in a few weeks or a few months I would have a new place for us to live, child support payments, and half the furniture so I could move on with my life as a fully single mother…

It didn’t work out that way. A week after I left my marriage my manager chose to terminate my employment with no explination (although I think my separating from my husband had something to do with it)… and I spent 6 weeks unemployed, not able to get unemployment benefits, not able to afford a new place to live, no car, and no support payments. While my ex received money from a mortgage refinance in order to pay off our marital debts… and when the debts were paid off, instead of sharing the remaining monies with me in order to allow me to take care of our children, he saddled me with the car which remained a huge payment around my neck.

Ten months later I am still waiting on formalized support payments… but I have been slowly able to save up money in order to pay my lawyer and allow myself to find an apartment to move into with my children. I was able to find a job that will allow me to afford full time daycare, rent, food, and utilities WITHOUT child support payments from my ex (since I haven’t received any to date). But it means that I will be stretched to the MAXIMUM, and I will need to start from scratch with very little wiggle room.

I have so many things that I need to get, you never realize how many small things it takes to run a household until you have to start again. So… because this is my blog, I will list the things I have to remember to get for my upcoming move (end of June, after my son is done his grade 2 year).

Common Household items:

• dish drainer with rubber under tray
• dish towels
• dish scrubbers
• dish detergent
• oven mitts
• pots and pans
• cutlery
• dishes
• cups
• mugs
• kettle
• tea pot
• measuring cups and spoons
• baking dishes/casserole dishes
• baking sheets
• storage jars
• cooking utensils
• tupperware storage containers
• bath towels/hand towels/face cloths
• twin sheets for both kids’ beds
• sheets for my bed
• pillows
• comforters
• broom
• mop
• laundry detergent
• cleaning supplies
• dusters
• toilet plunger (seriously, I have smallish kids, and that always means plungers are necessary!)
• bath mat