Date: August 6, 2008
It seems I am having issues when it comes to writing — both online and in journal books. With the journal books it seems there is so much that gets in the way:
1. Time — which is the biggest issue for me. It seems that sitting down to write is the last thing on my list, It just doesn’t seem to be my priority. Of course, basic survival (for myself AND the kids) must come first, but after that I do need a small amount of self care right now. Instead, I’ve allowed other things, and other PEOPLE, to fill up my time — things like tv, the computer, or K. Thing that aren’t giving back to ME…
2. Energy — since I tend to put everything else first, when I do have time, I’m usually pretty low on energy by the time I sit down to write things out. This has the effect of causing me to lose focus or to appear “depressed” when I write.
3. My inner critic — this is the very hardest thing for me to overcome for myself. No matter what I achieve I desperately want MORE perfection. It is as if I feel the only way I can be loved, accepted, and redeemed is through perfection in some area.
So, S has challenged me to make lists and then to choose one item from my list each day and write a minimum of 500 words and post on one of my blogs, and practice letting my words “flow” once more.
So this is my plan:
- try to write one post, either on OD, here, LJ, of Blogger every day for 1 month. This will allow me to develop a habit that will make it easier to continue to post and write.
- not get discouraged if I miss a deadline
- Complete and post ONE podcast every second week (when the kids are with their father)
- spend one night per week NOT in front of the computer so I can relax and renew my creativity.
Hang on. I said the challenge was 5 a week. 7 a week is much harder. 5 takes a lot of stress off while still leaving the pressure to actually *do* something.