Jan 12
Because I don’t talk about him enough… 
I don’t know if I have talked much about the Really Great Guy (TM) or RGG in this blog very much. I mean, I mention him in passing, I state a lot of things that are different about the relationship with him, as a passing comparison to either STBX or Stalker… but I don’t really talk much about him, per se. And if I do then I don’t really remember doing so…
And so I have decided that I will spend a little time talking JUST about RGG. Not about Stalker (partly because I think that I have poured enough energy into him lately, and how much I have worried about the past, I want to move forward, and forward would be RGG).
It is no surprise for me to state that I have been seeing RGG exclusively for two months now, but sometimes the fact that it has been such a short time surprises me when I pause to think about it. In some ways I feel like I have known him for so much longer (but not in the “OMG it feels like forever, can it end now”? Sort of way, the GOOD sort of way, you know)…
RGG was one of the first men to contact me via “eye contact” and direct message on Cupid.com. If I looked back I would say that he was exactly the SECOND that contacted me, and the second one that I actually chatted online with. I am pretty sure that I would not have joined MSN (as I generally haven’t used it) if I hadn’t been interested in “talking” to RGG, because he mentioned that he had MSN and if we could move off Cupid.com and onto MSN as a way to talk more.
Right from the very first time I first “talked” to RGG he came off as very different than the other guys I had been contacted by. We started off our relationship by feeling each other out on a personal level. He didn’t really start out asking a lot of flirty questions, it was more that we started out the same way you would if you were meeting someone new for coffee in public, not the idiotic come ons and such that you would get from guys who think they are anonymous online.
And that impressed me.
“Meeting” RGG
And it was comfortable, talking to him. He didn’t start off by asking for specifics that would have made me uncomfortable (like a few others had) and he didn’t start off with the hard core sexual innuendo/flirting that I had uncomfortably experienced previously. Instead he came off like a GENUINE person, a really NICE guy (apparently he has had other women tell him that he’s “too nice” which is one of those things that I don’t really “get” because I can’t see someone being “nice” as being a bad thing).
I think we really “clicked” when we started to chat online, even though he was really much less interested in the whole online chatting thing than I was. As far as I was concerned, if I could talk to someone via chat then it likely meant that I was going to be able to have a converstation with them, which is as important (if not more) than having sexual chemistry (which is good, but doesn’t last very long). And so the fact that we were able to really chat without awkwardness or resorting to the sexual innuendo (and the creepiness that that entails when a stranger tries to do that) and were able to flirt without being dirty or creepy really made me more and more curious about him…
Trying to meet…
Of course the next step, after we had started IM’ing each other, at least for me, was to try and meet to see how well we connected in person. But I am not really the type to push things, and as long as he seemed interested in nothing more than friendship (maybe that’s where “too nice” comes in? I mean, for the first month he didn’t seem at all that interested in more than chat with me… and I kinda got the impression from some of the things he was saying, that he had a few other women he was dating, so I didn’t know if he was busy with someone else or not interested or just wanting a friend, it just wasn’t immediately clear) but, hell, I was okay with that too… he seemed interesting and hopefully that would give me someone to meet and new people to talk to.
But I didn’t push it and I just waited, I mean we flirted in that he asked what I liked to do and what kind of movies I liked and things like that, and he said he liked to cuddle and he had “wandering hands”… and although I hoped for more intrest in getting together with him I also didn’t want to be too pushy and I waited to see if he had any interest in me (because I was pretty sure he was likely dating at the time, but again, I don’t really know either because I haven’t asked him (I didn’t figure it was any of my business at the time)).
Eventually, though, he asked and we set up a “date” for him to come over to my house and watch movies with me (yes, I know, that broke a few rules… but that’s what I did… I did tell G that he was coming over and as much as I knew about him, which at that time was ONLY his first name (I didn’t know his last name until I think a week later (laugh) because I was too shy to ask too many “snoopy” questions (as such there are a lot of things that maybe I should know about that I don’t because I don’t want to snoop)… )
The night before I was to meet him (friday) I had actually gone out with G to our “bi-weekly scrapbook” group I was feeling very blue and discouraged by the whole dating scene, missing my kids, and just feeling lonely. And I was happy that he was texting me, keeping me company and lessening my loneliness a little bit. He did offer to come and visit me that night, but I didn’t really want to ruin his night since i was having “issues” with the dating thing.
REALLY meeting…
The day I was supposed to meet RGG I was really in a tizzy! So much so that G actually came over to help me calm down while I tried to clean my entire apartment — take out the recycling, garbage, sweep and wash floors, clean bathroom, clean kitchen, clean liter box, tidy living room… — and to go shopping with me so I could remember to pick up the few things that RGG had mentioned that he would appreciate (Coke and popcorn) so that I could be ready when he came over. I really wanted to make a good impression, especially given the track record I had so far with “dates” (either they stood me up, only wanted sex, or were just creepy and I wanted to run FAR FAR away from them) and I had some connection with him online.
RGG asked me last week if it was true that most women know within 5 minutes if they would sleep with a guy… and I think that it is true. Even if I DON’T sleep with the guy, I know if I WOULD, given the right circumstances, after a certain period of knowing them… And so, yeah, within minutes of meeting RGG I knew that if that night went well, if we had the ability to have a conversation, since there was attraction on my part (don’t know about his part), that I figured that there was a strong possibility that I would sleep with this man…
But I wasn’t about to put out on the first date either… so there was a 50% chance that, given my not wanting to “put out” the first night that I’d never see him again…
Yah Rgggggg!! (That boy needs vowels!!!)