Feb 05
I know I talk a lot about RGG, but, well… he’s a big part of my life.
I’m okay with that.
RGG is very different than most of the guys I have hung out with and dated in the past, that is already a given, by the way I feel about him and the ways he has made me feel about our relationship and myself.
One thing is very different with RGG than anyone else I have dated before:
RGG is a “jock”.
I mean, TheEx CLAIMED to have been a jock in high school, but he was way more of a “geek” than he was a jock by the time we met. He didn’t do any sports, he wasn’t interested in any kind of physical activity, he never even really watched any sports seriously on tv.
The Stalker also claimed to be a jock, and stated that he was “really good” at a variety of activities — hockey, wrestling, martial arts — but there was no evidence in his mannerisms or body type at all that he had been a physically fit teenager, or that he was still interested in keeping up with the kinds of activities that he claimed to have been the “best” at in high school. He talked about being able to beat a 3rd degree black belt who happened to live in his basement for a period of time, and he did briefly do Tae Kwon Do… but his need to undermine himself (as he continually pointed out to me) had made him into more of a person living in his past than an athletic man in the present. No matter who or what he blamed it on, at the point that I met him in our lives he had given up all the sports and activities that he claimed to have loved so much.
But, like I said, RGG is different.
RGG was a football player, and as far as I can tell he still plays. He plays hockey. He coaches basketball at the school he works. He golfs in the summers. He watches sports on tv. He has gone to sporting events. He has maintained a more active (than the previous men I have dated) life style. He even plays sports related video games!! He seems INTERESTED in sports and staying active…
I think I kinda LIKE it, you know?
I mean, most of the guys I have dated in my past (with the exception of one I call ColdBlood) were interested in sports of one type or another –
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J1 played rugby, football, soccer, tennis, swam every morning, biked everywhere, did walks and runs for charities, and taught speed skating.
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my best friend in high school, Chris, biked everywhere, ran, played football and rugby, swam and did walks and runs
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the 2 guys I dated casually in high school were football and hockey players
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TheEx was a former football player
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my best friend from university, Entropy, camped and biked and worked out, golfed and had done some sort of sports (I think soccer or hockey) in high school (although didn’t have much time when he was in university with the huge course load of an engineering student)
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Stalker stated that he had been super good at hockey (until his mother forced him to quit), was almost a professional at wrestling (until he decided he was good enough and had no challenge in continueing), played football in high school, “almost” had an unofficial black belt (from the man living in his basement) and was EXCELLENT at martial arts (if he hadn’t decided there was no point in it for him), and had been a super fencer when he was in the SCA (if only his ex-girlfriend hadn’t forced him to quit going to meetings)
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3 of the guys I dated after stalker (one date each) went into the gym a lot, ran, biked and were interested in sports
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I “dated” the firefighter… who, by virtue of BEING a firefighter was physically very fit, a third degree black belt in karate, and worked out all the time…
So it seems that, despite the fact that I would have normally said that I went for “geeky, intellectual” men, I was really more attracted to jock types than I cared to admit.
Don’t get me wrong, I DO like men who are intelligent. I mean, I am a wordsmith by nature, I read, I write, I need to understand how the world around me works. I am not interested in being with someone that I absolutely CANNOT have a decent conversation with, but I also like to be with men who are active and interested in keeping at least a little bit FIT.
And I found that in RGG…
Over the three months that I have been exclusively dating RGG I have been to a hockey game, watchd him play hockey, and actually WATCHED the SuperBowl (for the first time in my life).
This is NEW for me.
And, you know what? Despite having stated no interest in sports previously, I am finding that when it is not a “I’m going to tune you out, go get me a beer woman” type thing sports can be interesting!
I really hope that it isn’t ME that has reduced my previous “men” into lazy couch potatos who only wanted to watch mindless tv and play shoot-em-up video games. I know its fun sometimes to do mindless things… but I’m really looking forward to having a much more ACTIVE lifestyle.
I have started to go to the gym (not nearly as often as I would like, mind you), and I have been feeling itchy to get moving a bit more. I want to take a dance class (preferrably Irish dance, screw theEx’s girlfriend because I seriously do NOT care what she thinks of me taking a dance class from “her” school) and I am seriously considering taking a martial art (Tae Kwon Do, with BoyChild next year)… I want to go for walks in the summer, go camping, and just be more ACTIVE than I have been for the last few years.
I would LIKE to go to live sporting events more. I would like to spend time outside with RGG doing some form of activity. I want to get into better shape (and don’t fool yourself thinking that just because I happen to have a low body weight and a metabolism that keeps me slim that I am “fit” or in good shape… ) I would like to learn to golf or do some of these things that everyone else does… I want to get out and be ACTIVE again instead of feeling like I am tied to a lifestyle that disdains physical activity.
RGG is good for me… he finally showed me that I can find that jock boys are not all mindless, crude, rough, violent testosterone laden men who cannot connect to the women in their lives, only like mindless blonde bimbos with huge boobs who fawn over them… they can be both active and intellectual, physical and gentle and caring…
I am really looking forward to the spring and summer and what kinds of new experiences being with him will bring…
I rely on the fact that round is a shape to avoid stressing about my fitness. I’m in a shape already!!