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Originally uploaded by Moonslark

My life has been… well… turned a bit upside down lately.
Anyone who might read here might have noticed that in the last few days I haven’t written much, which might likely seem a bit unusual for me…
Just know that there are things I don’t blog about, things that hurt too deeply to reveal to the entire universe. Things that keep me feeling frantic and anxious and that nothing in my world can work out right, and that’s kinda the space I am in with things RIGHT now.

I intend to take action on the “things”… as soon as the topsy-turvies in my life settle a bit — that being that this week has been HORRIFIC for me not only for the unmentionable things I am dealing with in the background, but also the kids’ schedules have been way more intense than normal (we have things we have to do EVERY evening this week, which has meant that with my schedule and theirs, meals have had to be “out”, which bit my budget in the ass for sure), theEx is on my case about flipping over the parenting schedule, which has unfortunate side effects on appointments and courses and things I had booked on the ORIGINAL schedule, and intense worry which has led to less eating and sleeping and WAY more crying on my part…

Well… lets just hope that things work themselves through a bit.

The next few weeks are going to be hairy for me. As I said, theEx wants to change the schedule because of the upcoming Easter break… which then throws MONTHS of plans into disarray because the weeks that I had THOUGHT I had the kids (approx first 2 weeks of each month) are now HIS weeks and vice versa…

I thought I could rearrange everything… but there are a few things that, if I dont’ change the schedule back, I will be taking vacation time on weeks I don’t have the kids instead of with them…

I have tried not to be a bitch to theEX… but… seriously I do plan things in advance… because I need to, because I CAN (with him being unemployed and not knowing when or where he’ll get another job, he doesn’t do much future planning, or at least he doesn’t tell me about it UNTIL its right on top of me (ie, his vacation to the Caribbean, the fact that he has a party to go to on GirlChild’s birthday (and its not for GirlChild, its purely for HIM alone), and the fact that he has a party to go to on April 4th that he alluded to in December… ) just to mess with MY schedule…

Yes, everything is pissing me off lately.