Autumn Rush…

 

The last week has gone by in a rush, what I call the “Autumn Rush”… The kids go back to school and everyone is starting to pack up their yards and harvest their gardens (and crops, because around here, the famers RULE), and the world of outside starts to be chilled in the mornings and evenings, and people start to pull into their homes more.

 

Last week it was actually SUMMERY here, for the first time in the entire year that temperatures were consistently over 15C, and it was nice. The kids got to wear their shorts and t’s to school and we had cool meals.

This week the mornings are decidedly nipping and the feel of the air is more autumn than summer. The days are still getting to 20C, but the winds are up, the nip is there, the scent of autumn is in the air, and we all know we will not be able to avoid the descent back into the huddling chill of winter.

 

We live in Saskatchewan. We don’t have the illusion that deep winter will never come. It is inevitable to come, blustering snow and blowing blizzard and all. It’s a matter of time.

 

And I feel the magnet of pulling inward too… the thought of going through my stores to see what I have, what I need and what I can stockpile for later. This has been going on for a bit now… I feel the pull start around Lammas (Aug 2) and the itch just gets stronger and stronger as I progress closer to Mabon (Sept 22)… culminating in the final harvest and end of the likely summery season at Samhain…

 

This week, though, the rush took on another meaning.  EVERY day I was rushing towards SOMETHING that I had to get done (well, except Monday, when I woke snuggling with my Honey and had a super relaxing afternoon and evening chatting with my best friend and making couscous salad)…

 

Tuesday was a rush as I got up late (doh!) for a company breakfast meeting. I mean, I LITERALLY had 2 minutes to get up, get dressed, brush teeth, feed cats, get my stuff and get to the meeting. As the site administrator it was my job to get this booked and make sure things went off without a hitch, and I was the one that was late. Thankfully the site that the meeting was at was not far from my house, so I got there only 15 mins late.

 

Tuesday night I had my very first Irish Dance class. Now, there is some issue with the Irish dance classes, because unbeknownst to me when I registered GirlChild in that school last year, theEx’s “friend” (they are dating but she won’t admit it because he has kids, which is perfectly fine by me… because it indicates that if they marry she will likely want the kids to be with me more than him) was an adult member of this school.

 

And now, here I am, having to walk on egg shells because his “friend” was there first. We’re not in the same class, but there is always a chance that there will be times when we will have to be in the same room. While I can ignore the fact that he’s dating her (I seriously don’t care, I just want him to leave me in peace) she seems to think that I’m just doing this to get him back… The fact that for 10 years before he even MET her I wanted to take Irish dance is completely ignored… and the fact that she’s obviously what he wants, since we never talk anymore, makes it all that much more laughable. What has he told her of me (other than he thought I fucked everything with a dick?)… she obviously is insecure about me, but he doesn’t even LIKE me, much less want to restart a relationship with me, and I have a man that makes ME happy and is much better suited to ME… so for the most part I pretend I don’t know that they are more than “friends”…

 

Okay… that’s a tangent. Just a vague sense that I’m stepping into territory that I shouldn’t be in… and if that continues next year I will register GirlChild and I in one of the other Irish dance schools (much more expensive, much more focused on Feis) so that she can keep her thing. Not so much a problem, really.

 

K, so Irish dance rocked…

 

Wednesday I had a dental appointment right after work. Which is never fun. She over froze me, then decided that the one filling she was going to do needed a root canal and did I want to go ahead with that or think about it.

 

Hmm… I am a single mother on a fixed income and you don’t allow installment payment AND I don’t have a pre-authorization from my health insurance for a root canal… so i’m thinking that I have to THINK about this first (especially since the LAST root canal that I had done involved 3 appointments, 1 specialist, $1200 paid up front, and the fact that I had to REPAY my then husband BACK for use of his insurance since mine didn’t cover the specialist???). I am seriously regretting having seen the dentist again, all the work she wants  me to have done will total over $2000 when everything is said and done (thanks to a trip to the dental surgeon which is NOT covered under my insurance AND has to be paid up front)…

 

Yeah. Ducky.

 

Right after that appointment I rushed over to register BoyChild in Wolf Cubs. Which was piles of fun since I was so frozen that I could barely talk. I thought maybe I would also volunteer to be a leader for him too, since he was REALLY REALLY disappointed that I just couldn’t find it in the budget to spend $75/month to take Tae Kwon Do with him this year. I have a feeling that theEx will have some whining to say about me being a leader… because he is like that “you don’t have to try so hard, you don’t need to do that…” mostly because he doesn’t want to do it, or he has something ELSE in mind… )

 

The sucky part was the dental freezing didn’t come all the way out until after I went to sleep… so I couldn’t eat anything for supper…

 

Thursday I rushed from work to a hair dresser appointment. It’s been 8 months since I had my hair done, and it was damaged and frizzy and just out of control. I know I should splurge and take care of myself more, but its so easy to think that I could spend that money on something else.

 

Of COURSE I could spend the money on something else. But there is something great about feeling a renewed sense of beauty for oneself. There was some akwardness, as the woman that I go to used to be a good friend of Reg’s… but because of the stress of his life lately, and the fact that he feels very awkward around her husband (and that she didn’t invite him to their wedding) I get the distinct feeling that she doesn’t consider herself his friend anymore. The fact that she was SURPRISED that I was still dating him, given that she sees him more as someone who just WANTS to be alone… maybe he’s gotta try to reach out more?

 

So I got a lovely haircut (and colour) and came home. Phoned my kids at my xMIL’s and talked to GirlChild and BoyChild for half an hour before they were to go to bed (theEx had to go to Vancouver — next time he goes out of town I will be requesting the kids are returned to MY house, because there is no reason that they have to be with someone OTHER than a PARENT (even a GRANDPARENT) if the other parent is available!) Then I called Reg and talked to him for an hour…

 

Then it was chill out time.

 

So I set my phone down on my couch, and my cat came up and lay down beside me… ON the phone…

 

UNTIL theEx accidentally sent me a text that was (I presume) meant for his girlfriend-who-is-only-a-friend…

 

And the cat LAUNCHED herself a foot in the air and ran off…

 

(hysterical laughter break)

Which brings us to TONIGHT (Friday) in which I have yet MORE rushing around to do… and some of it I am not looking forward to at all.

 

Right after work I have to make it into my bank to have my name changed on my bank documents. While this sounds simple, I have 9 outstanding cheques to the Irish Dance School for dance classes for my daughter and I, which I wrote out in June (BEFORE I realized I could easily change my name) and which have my formerly-married name on them. AND my soon-to-FORMALLY-be Ex husband usually writes out his child support cheques to me in my married name… so i have to make sure that these aren’t going to be problems. 

 

And I have to deal with having my name changed on my Visa account (so I can buy airline tickets in my maiden name thus NOT causing issues with customs when I cross the border!) AND I have to get assistance with getting cheques for my line of credit so I can pay my lawyer. 

 

THEN I have to go scrapbooking with G and her mother at their friends’ house. BUT because I was in a hurry this morning, I didn’t pack my stuff up to go! Argh! I’m so wiped after this week that I’m just not up to it (never mind the nagging headache I’ve had since the dentist)… I might have to beg off on G and just have a bath and do the housework I have been neglecting with the week being so busy.

 

This weekend isn’t any quieter, though… what with having a training session on Monday in Alberta and having to be back for work and dance on Tuesday… 

 

(yawn) I am EXHAUSTED!