Frozen Nowhere

These are not so much resolutions as REALIZATIONS that things have to change, and that now is as good of a time as any to get started. They aren’t NEW realizations, but they have slowly been condensing in the back of my mind for months, and the significant events of the past few weeks — being preapproved for a mortgage, buying a home for myself and my children, getting the divorce closer to being finalized, Yule, Christmas Holidays, New Years, and signing Mortgage Papers — have brought together a scintillating array of facts into clarity suddenly.
 
And I will be making changes… slowly, but surely…
 
Because of the scope of this project, though, I have decided to

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Okay, so there is a interesting internet meme thing that has been going on in the blogs that I have been reading lately, and since I’m having a craptacular day, feeling really bad about a bunch of stuff and worried about a bunch MORE, I have decided I’m gonna play along….

So here it is, in all its wonderous forms:

1. for the ground to dry up. Seriously, the yard at work looks like a swamp and I am tired of cleaning up mud in the office and from my car and off my clothes!! Added to this wonderousness is the fact that the city/town is doing construction on the ONLY road to access the office, and I’m a…

Lately i have been suffering from what I can only describe as exhaustion. I’m sure there is likely another reason for it, a more insidious reason lurking in my subconscious… but for now I would rather deal with it on the surface and not get too far into the details of what is failing in my psyche.

Things were just feeling… draggy. 

Work is seriously kicking my butt lately. Not a shock. Summer and fall are our busy times, and even though the sector I work in (construction) slowed down a bit in my area, we were relatively untouched from the larger recession and weathered the storm. What that meant for me was that although I had very little…

Ye Gods!
 
Its been a while since i wrote.
 
I could say that life is busy — but in reality it isn’t.
I could say that I have so many responsibilities — but I don’t.

The truth is that I have been driven under by OVERWHELM in my life right now… characterized by poor sleep, nightmares, anxiety, panicky feelings, tears, and complete uncertainty about my life choices and where I am going. There is no simple explanation about this… I just feel like things aren’t where I thought they would be, and the not being sure when things will change, improve, or just SHIFT is making me feel horribly insecure about…

Weekly Epiphanies!
 
(Sorry about the weird formatting in the entries, I have been testing a way to post entries from work, which means that sometimes things are not quite how I imagine them. If anyone reads this, and has a blog on wordpress, let me know if you have any tips for getting posts to format nicely??? KThx!)
I have decided, since I see a lot of my favourite bloggers doing this, that I will start weekly traditions in my posting. I am hoping that that will push me to post a bit more often and get me back into the thrill of writing again.
Havi over at The Fluent Self has Friday Check ins (or

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