Frozen Nowhere

The best part of my day used to be the 20 seconds in the morning where I would be smiling because someone cared enough to text me and let me know that they still cared… even when they were far away from me all week.

 Now that time is more often anxiety related than joyful. More often lately I am let down instead of buoyed up.

I find that the days he cares enough to text me in the morning I feel happier and more satisfied by our relationship. The days he doesn’t care enough to do it I see myself wondering if the relationship is going south again…

This one thing was (is?) the best signal of the health…

One of my new(er) passions has been art journaling… I know, I know, I haven’t mentioned it much, and I haven’t really shown any pictures of my art journals (or any of my journals), but it’s one of those creative outlets that I am SLOWLY, ever so painfully, hesitantly, SLOWLY using to open myself up to my creative potential.

Earlier this year (it seems so long ago, but I think it was early summer) I started looking around on the web, trying to figure out how to get inspired to DO this… (after all, I’m not an ARTIST!) and I came across Art Journal Love Letters by Connie Hozvicka. Unfortunately, Connie has recently decided to close this eCourse (sigh,…

IMG_0326

Originally uploaded by Moonslark

Okay… so I am not the best at taking pictures of things, but this is a picture of my new living room…
It looks REALLY REALLY boring in this picture… I haven’t gotten around to putting things on the walls yet, and due to time and labour constraints during the move, I didn’t get to paint the walls.

It’s really a MUCH bigger space than it looks… but with 2 love seats in the space I needed to provide seating space, ability to watch TV, and also the option of being social… the room seems “cut”.…

Big Changes

It’s been over 3 weeks (maybe more) since I wrote here, but it feels like a lifetime.

In three weeks I have packed up my entire life and moved it all over to the place I now OWN. I have been 100% responsible for making decisions of where to put things, what to decorate with, and what I want in my own house. I spent 5 precious days with Sunil sharing my city and celebrating how far I have come. I have decluttered, unpacked, donated, tossed out, and recycled my possessions. I have started the process of learning who *I* am…

For the FIRST time in my life I have been the person in control of my surroundings.…

I missed doing a Check-in last week because, well… things were crazy (and I was crazy exhausted because my neighbors woke me up SUPER early (4am) and I wasn’t well (UTI))… anyway here I am again…

The Bad Stuff

Still Exhausted

Just plain exhausted.  It seems that no matter how early I go to bed at night (I try to be in bed by 10pm, which is “early” since I get home from whatever activity I had that night at 8:30pm or 9:30pm and then I usually need to wash dishes and sweep floors and do some housekeeping) I don’t seem to be able to get a RESTFUL sleep.  With my anxiety over everything right now, and worrying that…