Frozen Nowhere

This week, so far, has been a huge roller coaster of emotions, and for that I think I am glad. I am bringing resolution to some of the unresolved issues in my life.
 
The biggest resolution was the knowing that, once and for all, forever and ever, the past friendship I had had (the one in which I felt the need to just vanish into the ether of the world from) is gone. Is that the resolution I was hoping for? No. Quite frankly, I knew that it was more likely than not that he would be upset with me, and likely that he would not want me in his life… but I think a (very, VERY, small and

…

A few years ago I made a mistake. Its a mistake I regret, but it is an indication of larger patterns in my life that I have ignored up until this point. 

I see it now.
14 years ago I cut ties with a friend because I was feeling terrible about myself and worried that I was falling in love with him. 
13 years ago I agreed to marry STBX, because I believed that no one else would ever care for me.
8 years ago my friend came back into my life. He was my best friend and a person that meant a lot to me.
4 years ago I “disappeared” from his life, I moved from the house

…

Life lessons of the moment

So… I intended to get to the podcast last night, only to find that the internet in my suite wasn’t working. It would bounce up and down, disconnecting me over and over. The biggest issue is that the main router for the residence was located upstairs, in the suite above me (yes, it is part of our rental agreement that the internet is part of rent, so no issues there) – and unfortunately for me the residents upstairs are not sure how to deal with the router.

So… that necessitated my landlords coming over and moving the main router to the common area (the laundry room) so…

So, I missed a day, so sue me. I know, it’s not like I can claim that anything is really going ON around here, because, my life really is very boring lately. But there are days I can’t bring myself to write… 

But I will anyway… 

I was given this idea by a friend, that when I was at work I should try to write a bit on my breaks. The way my job works out, I tend not to have formalized breaks in my day – I take the kids to the babysitter by 7:30am, then I have a 45 min drive from the town I live in to the town I work in…all the way through rural Saskatchewan. I arrive at work around 8:00-8:15, but usually before 8:30am… and usually work at the computer from 8:30am until 5:00 pm when I make my 45 min drive through rural Saskatchewan to pick up my kids at the babysitter’s home.  While I am at…