Frozen Nowhere

What I feel needs to be changed: I want to change my approach to Spirituality

What I realized was hurting me:

In the most basic sense of the word I have isolated myself from my spirituality, and I feel the keen loss and the “calling home” sense. I have to admit that it has been a LONG time since I was an active participant in my spiritual path…

I have never felt anything profound and glorious and sparkly from the “Status Quo” religions of my life –The traditional churches left me feeling… empty. At 17 I started reading everything I could find on Wicca and started putting things into practice on my own. I dedicated myself, found others…

Exactly the situation that I find myself in, right now, asking “where am I? where am I going? where does that leave me now?”…
 
I have decided that for the time being I am going to sit back and just take the time to think about what I want and where I am heading on my Path. I have to do this, because the past few years have really led me to reconsider the words I use in relation to myself, and the way I view myself.
 
Because of the climate that I have discovered in the “new” Pagan community that I resurfaced into, I no longer feel that I am allowed to claim the title “Wiccan”

…

For the first few months after I realized that there were other people who felt the “prescence” in the forests and trees, communed with the natural world, and seriously felt a spiritual connection to nature… I started reading. Voraciously (or more voraciously than I had previously).
 
But I read a lot, and I explored a lot, and I took a lot of time out to think and feel and experience what it was that I was needing from my spirituality and what I was getting from this new realization that there was a path out there where I could find what I needed FOR MYSELF without needing to beg others for information of the deeper mysteries, where my

…

Because I had been raised Christian it was very hard to view relgion as anything BUT Christianity. I didn’t have the exposure to other forms of spirituality or relgion, and everything that didn’t fit into the small box that was labelled “Christian Faith” was assumed to be evil, wrong, misguided, tempation, or demonic. 

Which made for a very hard decision on my part, especially as a 16 year old girl…
 
What is a child to do, when they have only ever been exposed to the idea that religion=christianity and no religion=satanism? Well… if they are like me, they start to do some RESEARCH into what religion IS and what different views of religion are out there.
 

…

One thing that I have, in the recent past, been accused (or, rather, verbally assaulted) about is the fact that I haven’t been practicing my spirituality.
 
Or, rather, that I am not doing what OTHER people think that I need to do.
 
Which, although they may be correct in stating that I haven’t been picking up on a spiritual practice yet, makes me wonder…
 
What the hell does it matter to ANYONE else how I feed my soul?
 
And I have come to the natural and perfectly acceptable conclusion:   

MY SPIRITUALITY IS NONE OF ANYONE ELSE’S BUSINESS UNTIL OR UNLESS I MAKE IT THEIR BUSINESS.
 
Phew. Glad I got that off my chest.
 
I have always…